Long Live the ‘White Collar’ Bromance

What happens when you take a smooth-talking-white-collar criminal and pair him with a by-the-book too-much-starch-in-his-shirt detective?

USA Network has answered the question with “White Collar.” The budding bromance between Neil Caffrey (Matthew Bomer) and Peter Burke (Tim DeKay) continued last week in Episode 2, “Threads.” Unlike most sitcoms and dramedies, where a few episodes are dedicated to poking fun of male-on-male friend relationships, “White Collar” has centered its entire show on Neil and Peter’s offbeat and often-cutesy tug-of-war.

In “Threads,” Neil throws Peter an assist by helping Peter impress Elizabeth (Tiffani Thiessen), Peter’s wife. Instead of taking the glory in finding an excellent party location for an FBI sting, Neil decides to tell Peter’s wife, who is planning the event, that Peter found the location. By doing so, Neil proves that having a wingman is not just necessary in dating, but also in sustaining a healthy marriage. Later on, Neil helps to “dress up” Peter as a tough-guy bodyguard. The scene was reminiscent of seeing a wife help her husband get dressed, by fixing his tie for his first day of work. You can join me in two quick finger snaps if you thought the scene was adorable.

But don’t be fooled into thinking that these two forces will always be on the same page when it comes to matters of the heart — or their bromance. Both Neil and Peter have no remorse in using the other to achieve their end game. When Neil needs to check out the tape of Kate’s last prison visit for a secret message, he asks Peter to do him a solid and get him the tape. Of course, nothing comes without a price when dealing with the law. Peter responds, “Help me wrap up this case and I’ll see what I can do about that tape.” Peter is left thinking that Neil wants to see the tape as a simple heartfelt memento, but he isn’t above getting his price paid first. Whatever happened to “bros before hoes?” Thankfully, neither of their secret desires has been maliciously aimed at hurting the other.

The bromance between Neil and Peter isn’t the only thing grabbing a laugh on “White Collar.” The villains are laughable too. When Ghovat (Carlo Rota of “24“), Episode 2’s criminal, is trying to escape with the spoils of white-collar war, he says, “Please don’t try anything. I have five bars and free long distance; I can be far away and still cause you pain.” And, I bet you thought Verizon was doing a good thing by having that large network? Back to T-Mobile!

In White Collar Episode 3, “Book of Hours,” the disappearance of a precious bible creates an interesting union when a New York Mafia kingpin enlists the help of Peter and the FBI in tracking down his beloved artifact. But while rooting out the thief, Neal finds himself in a tango with a sexy female villain and must decide where his loyalty truly lies.

Episode 3 premieres this Friday at 10/9C.