While the King’s away, the assassins will play. Several members of the Henry’s royal court, and Cromwell’s inner circle, died in Season 3 Episode 5 of the Tudors. The first death went to Mr. Robert Packington, whose mysterious assassin never heard the meaning of discreet. After shooting Packington in the head, the assassin ran through the streets brandishing his gun. Whatever ever happened to dumping the evidence? At least, that’s what I would have done. Surprisingly, none of the King’s loyal subjects saw anything. Methinks even in 1537, being a rat isn’t necessarily a good thing.
Episode 5, opened up with Henry mourning the death of his wife Jane. He tells her that he will lie with her again in death eternally. How romantic. The scene immediately jumped to the streets of England, covered in pig meat and decapitated swine heads. I wonder if Michael Hirst is insinuating the Lady Jane really died of Swine Flu?
Henry has become a recluse, allowing only the court Fool in his presence. In the King’s absence, Cromwell tries to garner the attention of the nobles of court to bring tranquility to the kingdom. Unfortunately, his inflated title of Privy Seal does little to give him the respect he so desperately desires. The Duke of Suffolk gives Cromwell a verbal pimp slap (more like a b!^@h slap) in return. “Mr. Cromwell, you presume too far above your very base and low degree. Until the king is well, you will not summon me anymore to anything.”
The murders go on around the castle. The latest victim is the Sergeant-at-Arms who jumps into the middle of a brawl ensuing outside his window. Cromwell tries to aid the Sergeant by sending in his own troops. Unfortunately, these troops just happen to be the slowest moving guards in history. As Cromwell urges them on yelling, “Go,” they simply give a hop and strut forward. In the next scene they’ve miraculously learned to run, but too well to save the Sergeant-at-Arms who is stabbed repeatedly.
Edward, Jane’s brother and uncle to the new prince, warns Sir Bryan about Francis’ advances on his wife. At home however, his threats seem empty, as Edward’s own wife says that Bryan “makes me laugh.” Oh, is that what they call a public orgasm in England? That’s the kind of information they leave out in high school history classes. Edward responds by saying, “I’m sure he makes a lot of women laugh.” The scene ends with Edward’s wife bluntly stating, “Don’t expect me to be faithful.” She should be thankful that she isn’t married to one of the more abusive members of court. Edward lets her slip by with this statement, instead focusing on the more important task – power.
I hate to go there, but something was definitely wrong in the scene where Henry rests his head in his Fool’s lap. If just the thought of that doesn’t sound bizarre, what happens afterwards surely will. The camera drifts up to just show the Fool and only the top of Henry’s head, while the Fool strokes the King’s hair. I won’t say where I’m going with this, but watch the scene and tell me if it doesn’t weird you out, especially since at the end of the scene Henry wipes the side of his mouth.
The Fool, the only man in court allowed to tell Henry the truth about himself without losing his head, is finally able to break through the King’s mourning by exposing Henry to the truth behind his own grief. The Fool asks Henry, “Why go on dwelling in darkness? You know that the land of the wounded king is only a parched wasteland thirsting for rain and your majesty’s grace.”
Father Pole has been on the run from the King’s assassin, Sir Francis Bryan. He seeks refuge in Italy with the Cardinal. As a follow up to the earlier scene with Henry and the Fool, the Cardinal says, “If you once let down your guard, the Devil will slip, like a serpent, into your mouth. And, forever afterwards he will speak for you.”
The King has decided to roll back his Reformations on the Church. Henry, a devout Catholic at heart, signs six doctrinal questions that negate Cromwell’s reforms. The result prompts the Duke of Suffolk to smile coyly at a squirming Cromwell.
As The Tudors Season 3 Episode 6 continues, Cromwell begins the search for a new Queen to take the hand of Henry.
those connections remind me of high school english lit classes. They always flew way over my head but made sense after i failed the test.
If only 1537 England was like Dungeons and Dragons or the X-Men. Then Cromwell could simply swing by the local Assassin’s Guild, Tavern, or check in with Swamp Thief Gambit to find out just who is behind all these assassination attempts.